When Caring Hurts: Understanding Compassion Fatigue Without Shame
- Lisett Figueroa, LPC, NCC, PMH-C
- Jul 13
- 4 min read
Issue #7 of Rooted | Vive Healing Collective | July 13, 2026
A weekly letter for those who give everything — and are learning their needs matter too.
Lisett Figueroa, LPC, NCC, PMH-C | Vive Counseling & Wellness | Yuma, Arizona
Hello, and Welcome Back!
If you're someone who spends your days caring for others—as a parent, healthcare professional, therapist, teacher, caregiver, or simply the person everyone turns to—I wrote this week's issue, When Caring Hurts: Understanding Compassion Fatigue Without Shame, with you in mind.
Giving so much of yourself comes at a cost, even when you love what you do. Over time, carrying the emotional weight of others can leave you feeling depleted in ways that rest alone doesn't fix. Compassion fatigue is a real and understandable response to caring deeply. It isn't a sign that you're failing or that you've lost your capacity to care. It's a signal that you, too, need care. Understanding it may be one of the kindest things you do for yourself this year.
WHAT IS COMPASSION FATIGUE?
Compassion fatigue is what can happen when you've spent so much time holding the pain, grief, and needs of others that your own nervous system begins to carry the weight, too. It isn't simply about working too much or being tired. It's the emotional cost of caring deeply, consistently, and often without enough space to be cared for yourself.
You might notice it as feeling emotionally numb where you once felt deeply. Becoming more irritable with the people you love. Dreading work or responsibilities that once felt meaningful. Or moving through your days on autopilot while feeling disconnected from yourself.
If any of this feels familiar, I want you to hear this: nothing is wrong with you.
These are not signs that you've stopped caring. They're signs that you've been carrying more than any one person was ever meant to carry alone.
Your mind and body are asking for the same compassion you've so freely given to everyone else. Listening to those signals isn't selfish—it may be one of the most caring things you do, both for yourself and for the people who depend on you.
Signs of compassion fatigue:
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ONE PRACTICE THIS WEEK: YOU WERE NEVER MEANT TO CARRY IT ALL
At the end of today, take a quiet moment to ask yourself:
What am I still carrying that doesn't belong to me?
Maybe it's a difficult conversation, a client's grief, your child's worries, a loved one's pain, or the weight of trying to hold everything together for everyone else.
Write down one thing you've been carrying.
Then, before you put the paper away, remind yourself:
"I can care deeply without carrying it all. I was never meant to carry it alone."
This isn't about caring less. It's about remembering that compassion doesn't require self-abandonment.
The more you practice noticing what is yours and what you've been holding for someone else, the more your nervous system learns that it's safe to set some of that weight down. And that may be one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself.
JOURNAL PROMPTS
Take a moment to reflect:
Where in my life have I been carrying more than I was ever meant to carry?
What thoughts, emotions, or responsibilities am I holding that don't truly belong to me?
If someone I loved were carrying what I'm carrying right now, what would I want them to know? Can I offer that same compassion to myself?
Whatever came up for you: that awareness is not a small thing.
It is the beginning of something.
Want to go further? The Healing Collective — our paid newsletter — takes this week's theme further. This week's paid issue includes an extended deep-dive on the three phases of compassion fatigue and the critical distinction between compassion fatigue and burnout that changes how you heal, a compassion fatigue self-assessment with scoring, five somatic recovery practices built specifically for helpers and caregivers, six journal prompts including a letter-writing exercise, and an exclusive chapter preview from the You Were Never Meant to Carry It All journaling workbook. All of it written for the person who has been giving for so long they've stopped believing they're allowed to receive. When you're ready: myvivecounseling.com/subscribe $9/month. Everything this letter is, and the parts it couldn't hold. |
You Were Never Meant to Carry It All A Compassion Fatigue & Resilience Journaling Workbook For healthcare professionals, first responders, and caregivers who are regularly exposed to grief, loss, and the suffering of others. Seven chapters. Structured journaling entries. Self-reflection practices. Written to help you process what you carry — and begin to carry it differently.
Available now: myvivecounseling.com/shop You are allowed to take up space in your own healing |
You don't have to wait until the breakdown.
Vive Counseling & Wellness is accepting new clients. I work with people who keep showing up, holding it all together, while feeling exhausted beneath the surface. Bilingual support available in English and Spanish. In-person in Yuma, Arizona + telehealth options throughout Arizona.
Book now → myvivecounseling.clientsecure.me | 928-581-6602
With warmth,
Liz — Lisett Figueroa, LPC, NCC, PMH-C
Vive Healing Collective | Vive Counseling & Wellness
Disclaimer: Vive Healing Collective provides educational and informational content only and does not offer therapy or clinical services. To maintain clear therapeutic boundaries, individuals currently receiving psychotherapy services from Lisett Figueroa, LPC, NCC, PMH-C (“Liz”) are not eligible to participate in paid membership offers through
Vive Healing Collective.
Free educational resources remain available to all.
Free or paid membership subscription do not establish a therapist-client relationship
928-581-6602 | www.myvivecounseling.com | Yuma, Arizona
Vive Healing Collective | © 2026 Vive Counseling & Wellness PLLC | Yuma, Arizona
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